When you?re married with children, you need to do anything you can to keep your groove on, and a healthy fantasy life is key. Fortunately, child care duties can coexist with this important practice ? that is, if you call plunking your kids down in front of the TV ?child care,? and heck, I sure do! So while the kids are being entertained in the land … Continue »
What's The Most Polite Way To Say "I Think You're A Child Molestor?"
My eight-year-old son wanted to have a sleepover party for his birthday, so we invited the usual suspects: the next door neighbor, a kid he's been friends with since infancy, and another long-time school buddy. Wanting to encourage my often-shy son to keep making new friends, I urged him to invite another nice-seeming boy named Gerry from his … Continue »
Herland. Why are there are still so few male teachers?
At a party I attended a few years ago, I was enchanted by a guy who gravitated towards me and my son and spontaneously began singing songs to us ? preschool classics like ?Head, Shoulders, Knees and Toes? and ?Three Little Fishes.? When I asked him how he knew all that material ? he looked too young to be a father ? he told me that he used to work … Continue »
The Six Biggest Pregnancy Myths
As I was preparing to leave the hospital after the birth of my son, a nurse sat me down and solemnly told me that it was very important, while breastfeeding, to ?avoid all spicy foods like Mexican or Indian.? I imagined a sari-clad wife cradling a newborn and looking on sadly as her Mexican husband cleared their refrigerator of tikka masala, … Continue »
Bad Parent: Scare Tactics. Why my family doesn't attend the mall's "Safe Halloween."
At Halloween, there are few words that frighten me more than ?Bring your kids to the mall for our annual ?Safe Trick-or-Treat!'? It?s not that I?m afraid that Halloween is a thinly disguised occasion for devil worship. Some fret over Halloween?s alleged satanic origins, but even if it were conclusively proven that the first jack o? lantern were … Continue »
TV, Or Not TV?
When Teletubbies appeared in 1997, the world got its first glimpse of a TV series produced specifically for babies, as well as its first glimpse of a future utopia in which infants would be born with television screens embedded in their torsos. Many were appalled at the prospect of a program being marketed to a pre-verbal audience, and the show … Continue »
Alone in a Crowd: I'm the only one who had kids
In certain circles, having children is not the most fashionable thing to do. It?s often regarded as a curious, amusing, but why would anyone want to do that to their life? sort of thing. Strangely enough, I happen to be part of one of these circles, and I?ve got two kids. What was I supposed to do ? tell my friends that they?d better get on the … Continue »
Rules Of The Game
The first time I took my toddler son to the playground, I wiggled my toes in the sand and looked around, feeling amused and delighted to be revisiting a place that, twenty-five years earlier, had been a near-daily part of my life. The sun was shining, my baby boy was beautiful, and all seemed right with the world. I handed my son the shiny new … Continue »